Australia vs USA – Esteem – Part 4
By mattsmallbone. Filed in Australia |
Whoa Nelly.
I didn’t realize the amount of self-evaluation that climbing this pyramid would take. I have found myself really missing Australia over the last 10-days. Three days ago I heard a good friend of mine was moving back to Australia from Mobile, AL. It kind of knocked my legs out from under me. I am in a tender place at the moment… and I blame this blog. Sometimes it’s just emotionally easier to not unpack these things.
Anywho…
Today we consider issues of esteem. I’m not entirely certain as to whether geography plays a major role in this step towards self-actualization… but… I started this emotional jaunt into the recesses of my soul… and by gum… I will finish it.
Esteem is the normal human desire to be accepted and valued by others. People need to engage in stuff that gives a sense of contribution in order to feel accepted and self-valued.
I’ve decided not to hit all of the sub-headings as outlined in Maslow’s pyramid on this one. It seems a bit nerdy for a Monday. I am gonna vibe this one out.
Here we go…
Self-esteem: This has never been too much of a struggle for me. I had bad skin and was uber-skinny in high school… but I survived. I felt very much loved by my parents, pulled pretty good grades, was ok at sport, was quasi-popular socially and played a musical instrument that has mysterious powers over the opposite sex.
Nothing too much has changed since moving to the USA.
Tie.
Confidence: If anything, I feel like my confidence in myself continues to grow. This tends to happen when you have surrendered your will to that of a loving creator. I have a deep confidence in a God who I have continually seen provide for me and my family.
In terms of my professional life… the USA has allowed me to achieve much more than I thought was possible for a young bloke from the bush. This instills a great deal of confidence.
USA 1 – AUS 0
Respect of/ by others (the need for status, recognition, fame, prestige, and attention)
Two years ago I played on a live worship DVD that was shot in Houston, TX. We did the show in an ex-NBA arena and the record/ DVD has gone on to win awards and sell a gazillion copies. I have seen myself playing bass on the flat-screens of retail establishments around the world. This kind of thing makes you feel respected by others… at least at a professional level.
I have to hand this one to the USA. I can’t imagine feeling ‘this respected’ had I stayed in Australia.
USA 2 – AUS 0
So, the USA closes the gap today and we are at 2 all as we head into the final round.
To be honest, I can’t wait for all of this introspection to be done with. Sometimes this sanguine guy just wants to smell the roses and turn the music up to eleven.
Monday, February 8th 2010 at 2:21 pm |
Hey Matt, thanks for sharing again. My head is sort of empty, dont know what to say, just this: I am praying for you and your family!!!
God bless ya
Marja
Monday, February 8th 2010 at 3:01 pm |
Hey Matt,
You know, I was homesick for years, longing for Canada. Wondering where I should truly settle. Then, one morning in 2005, God revealed to me that my home was the Netherlands, after 10 tough years. Our wedding text from the Bible book of Ruth just popped into my head one morning and that was it for me. “Your people shall be my people, your God my God.” I had long forgotten that text. Since then I have had no more homesickness. The Holy Spirit has literally filled the gap!
Five years earlier, the words, “I am your home” went through my mind. That really hit me and a year later I literally found those words in the Bible. Amazing. So, God had continually been working on my heart. Now I realize, I can function anywhere because He’s beside me.
As far as identity goes, sometimes we need to go through a struggle to finally find this in Christ alone. This can be painful. Ultimately, it doesn’t matter what I do, have or what others think of me. These things are so temperal. In Christ I am a new creation & live in that freedom with joy.
When I look back on the last 15 years in the Netherlands, I’ve had amazing musical opportunities which I probably wouldn’t have had in Canada. I’ve joined Darlene Zschech, Ron Kenoly, Travis Cottrell, Delirious?, and the list goes on. The ultimate was the concert with Smitty & you guys! So glad I hung in there! God is full of wonderful surprises and amazes me over and over again.
I’m praying for you and your family. May He give you wisdom and peace.
Andrea
Monday, February 8th 2010 at 3:07 pm |
Dear Matt,
Thanks so much for sharing this!
Neeta
Monday, February 8th 2010 at 4:28 pm |
Hey Matt,
Thanks for sharing this, and for the honesty. I’ve really enjoyed reading your blog so far.
I really appreciate the thought you are putting in to this. I’ll be praying for you, your family, and your ministry.
God bless,
Susie
Monday, February 8th 2010 at 4:59 pm |
Hey Matt,
Enjoying this series as another Aussie expat. I found that living overseas for the first couple of years I felt less Australian and more like a “world citizen”, but after 2-3 years or so when I started to see what a great place Australia was I began to feel more Australian than ever. Subconsciously words like “mate” slipped back into my vocabulary.
While the comparisons here are pretty entertaining, they are largely measuring how comfortable we feel in each country. So as someone living in Asia I find I’ll never be as comfortable as I am back home, but I don’t actually want that. I went back to Oz for a couple of years and got really bored because everything around me made waaaaay too much sense. I guess that’s the culture junkie in me – if I understand everything it’s boring, and I hate being bored most of all.
Tuesday, February 9th 2010 at 4:04 am |
Hey he who shares my name:
Very nice…everything on your site. Your comments on marriage changed my outlook on the subject. Over all the years, all the talking and thinking and feeling shared with friends on this issue, I think yours is quite possibly the most simple, direct and profound I’ve ever read and thought upon. You hit the nail on the head – take care of the basic stuff, and have fun together. I can’t tell you how many of my friend’s marriages might be intact today had they concentrated on that simple yet completely workable focus. Bravo, mate!
Tuesday, March 16th 2010 at 2:15 pm |
Great video ! Thank you. We are all one family!
Monday, March 22nd 2010 at 1:42 am |
Hi, I’ve been a lurker around your blog for a few months. I love this article and your entire site! Looking forward to reading more!
Tuesday, March 23rd 2010 at 8:28 am |
Your video is great! So is the concept with song! Thank you Michael ! LOVE